Helpful Habits: Small Habits, Big Shifts

Looking for a habit that actually changes how you feel, think, and create? We take one community-voted question...what small habit has made a big difference...and follow it into surprising places: meditation that doesn’t feel like punishment, an accidental breakup with caffeine, acupuncture that clears the fog, and the underrated power of protecting your creative time like it’s oxygen.

If you’re ready to try one shift this week—swap a cup of coffee for water, set a phone curfew, book acupuncture, sketch before breakfast, or sit with that inner light—this conversation offers practical starting points and real stories of change. 

Subscribe, share with a friend who needs a nudge, and leave a review with the one habit you’re committing to next. What small move will you try tomorrow?

Special thanks to Rhys Lombardo and Bruce France for making this sound sooooooo good!

If this sparked something for you, follow the show, share it with a friend, and leave a review or text us through the link above with the question you want us to explore next.

Want to meet the Curious Krewe in person?  Here is your formal INVITATION.

Curious about all-things Curious Krewe?  All roads converge HERE.

Until then, Stay Curious!

Transcript

Welcome To Curious Crew

Sam 0:06

Do you ever wish for a place where you can ask real questions without a fight? Do you ever want to sit with people who see the world differently than you and still feel connected? Do you ever crave a circle that listens more than it lectures and leaves you a little more human than when you arrived? If this is you, welcome to the Curious Crew Podcast. One honest question with many voices and with real connection. It's where we listen first and we practice curiosity with kindness and then become curious friends together. So without further ado, let's get curious.

Colette 0:55

Welcome to the Curious Crew podcast, where we believe curiosity leads to connection. My name is Colette. My pronouns are they and them, and I'm one of your curious co-hosts. Each episode we pose one curious question voted on by the Curious Crew to our panel of curious people. And yes, I'm going to keep saying curious. We get curious about their thoughts and perspective and grow into curious friends together.

Sam 1:20

Well, that's nice. Uh hey y'all, my name is Sam. That makes you you. And just like we do every month in person to get us warmed up, we kick off by having the folks sitting around the table share their names and their answer to this curious quickie, which is, and this is by far the most weirdest one I've ever done. And I'm really, I want to see. What animal would you swap brains with for a day?

Icebreaker: Animal Brain Swap

Marla 1:44

Right. And so my response is gonna be even weirder.

Sam 1:48

Oh.

Marla 1:48

You want to share your name?

Sam 1:50

Maybe not. It depends on the response.

Marla 1:52

Share my name. My name is Marla. Marla. Marla. I'll go with the first name um status. I um I'm gonna be quite contrarian and and use the fusile wiggle out method and say that I I don't want to change brains with an animal because we are animals. I'm having a hard enough time trying to figure out the enigma that is the human animal.

Sam 2:17

This is supposed to be a light question. What are you doing? This is wonderful.

Colette 2:22

Now we're getting into the nature of humanity.

Sam 2:24

Wow, this was from this.

Marla 2:26

Sorry, guys, I just couldn't.

Sam 2:28

That's pretty good. Yeah, I like it.

Marla 2:30

I'm having a hard enough time um grappling with with our animal. And so I don't know that I'd want to change places with an animal. I I think I love animals as they are. And by the way, it's an unbalanced proposition because most animals don't have the gift of reasoning to be able to have that same answer a quick question posed to them.

Sam 2:50

That's fair.

Marla 2:50

So they can't consent to the swap. They can't consent to the swap. Yeah. So I like they'll think I'm gonna pass.

Sam 2:56

Well, I clearly didn't think through the ethics and morality of this question.

Colette 3:01

Yeah.

Sam 3:01

That's good though. That's good.

Colette 3:04

Your morally debased hypothetical question. How dare you?

Rhys 3:07

Yeah. You know, it's what you get. Well, I will answer from the fur animal category and say I would be a cheetah. Ooh. Oh, yes. My name's Reese. The Reese Cheetah.

Colette 3:21

We're so excited to answer the question we forget to introduce ourselves.

Rhys 3:24

I use he, they pronounced. Today I feel like a they, so I'm gonna go with a they them. Gotcha, they be. Uh a little non-bee over here. That's what I call them. Non-bees. Um but yeah, a cheetah. I've always wanted to be a cheetah, and I was actually like, why? And I was Googling what does it mean if you want to be a cheetah? Oh. And it basically means somebody who wants to be very fast-paced in movement and very agile and strategic. And that is absolutely me. Wow. So cheetah. Just so it could also run at like 70 miles per hour and not get winded. Okay. Yeah.

Sam 4:00

That seems to be useful.

Rhys 4:02

Yes. But I mean, I mean you can only sprint. You wouldn't be able to keep that up.

Sam 4:05

I see, I see, I see. That's I need to do that. I didn't know you could do that. Well, I don't want to say my answer now.

Colette 4:11

What does it mean about you?

Sam 4:12

We're gonna psychologically basically your answer. Well, I mean, I already know that it's easy for me. I'd want to be a dog.

Colette 4:19

Yeah.

Sam 4:19

Because it's like I you know, you were talking about they can't maybe one of us doesn't want to reason anymore. It is this like, I just want to be oh what food? All right, awesome. It's like this is the greatest person in the world to me right here, you know? And it's like, oh, I'm gonna sleep for 16 hours. And then, you know, I just uh I I would love to just live that kind of a free, easy, you know, really I mean, comfortable life. At least that's from my per perspective for my dogs anyway.

Rhys 4:47

But yeah, would you be like uh golden, like playful and affable, or would you be a um uh what do you call those German Shepherd?

Sam 4:55

Oh no. See, no, no, no. I I wouldn't want to go for the the golden, like the retriever variety, you know, the ones that are just like they're just sweet and they're big hugs, and that's what they are. That's that's what I would want to go with. Yeah. Definitely. I don't want to have any more aggression in my life.

Colette 5:11

I found a I found a hair on my mic. I'm pretty sure it's a cat hair. Which is my answer to the question. Oh that's probably fine.

Rhys 5:21

Sorry.

Colette 5:22

Or or one of mine, I don't know. Um but yeah, I I'm like Sam, I would like to live the good life, swap brains with a domestic house cat. Uh probably most specifically because recently my uh 14-year-old cat Jenkins died. And I'm like, I want to know what that was like. And I'm like really one inside of my other cat's head, Chloe, because she's just her. I'm I'm curious about what is grief like inside of an animal's mind. Like, I know what it's like inside of my animal mind, but like I'm very curious about how do animals experience emotion. Also, I read this thing that talked about the reason why cats can be so like relaxing is because they're regulated predators. They move when they want to move, they sleep when they want to sleep, they hunt when they want to hunt, like they're just like very in the instinct of all, and they're always like trying, they're always staying regulated. They're never like they're never frazzled for long.

Sam 6:22

Interesting.

Colette 6:23

Um, which look, I can't relate. I really can't.

Sam 6:28

But you want to.

Colette 6:29

I really want to. I really want to. I feel like I got a lot to learn from a cat.

Rhys 6:33

That makes a lot of sense. Like my cat will sleep on my chest, and it's the most relaxing thing ever.

Colette 6:39

Well, the thing about their purrs is so there's a f sound frequency that helps promote healing, and cats purr at that frequency.

Sam 6:48

I love that so much.

Colette 6:49

Yeah.

Sam 6:50

There's actually some uh it's funny you said it. I feel like in the last, I don't know, maybe maybe decade, maybe a little longer, there's actually a lot of legitimate animals, particularly like dogs and cats study, like down to this level, like asking questions like what is its neurology, what is its feelings, and and and you know, and uh and all these like I think one dog actually knew 160 some odd words. Like they go to those pads, you know. So yeah, I d it's it's interesting. We'll probably actually find out some of the answers to these questions eventually. Yeah, I hope with what's going on in cats and dogs' heads.

Colette 7:24

Yeah.

Sam 7:24

But wow, this was so well, let me see. Two felines, two felines, a dog, one canine, and one homo sapien, one a homo sapian and a homo sapien. Yeah, yeah. Thanks for keeping us around. I'm very useful.

Colette 7:41

25%.

Sam 7:41

Listen, I'm not gonna be like the other cats and like push shit off the table, you know.

Colette 7:46

I'm just classic retriever nonsense. Look, I just want to kill things like eight to twelve times a day. That's what cats do. Killing things constantly this does.

Rhys 7:56

I have to say, I will say something a little pushy envelope too. They asked, did y'all ever see where um on late night at camp Steve Colbert asked Jude Law what the most dangerous animal was? Oh no, what? I did not see that. And he said fascist Homo sapien. Oh. That's a good answer. I was like, that's very interesting. I'm just gonna drop mic drop that one. I'm not gonna say anything further. I think so. Take what you will out of that one.

Marla 8:20

Stands on its own. Yeah.

Sam 8:22

Well, this developed into a I could use this for the normal question, probably, I think.

Colette 8:27

Oh, for sure.

The Big Question: Small Habits, Big Impact

Sam 8:27

Yeah, good one. That's good. I like that. Right. Well, we are very warmed up, I would say. Um, and so we can move on to the main question, our main curious question for this episode, which is uh I liked how everybody voted on this. What's a small habit or routine that has had a big impact on your personal growth or well-being?

Colette 8:49

So before we dive in, here's a quick reminder of the curious code. First, we respect respect beats being right always. Listen up and no introductions. Oops, excuse me, interruptions. Or introductions while we broke our lock. Um keep an open mind. It's how we grow. Respond with curiosities, uh, particularly try instead of making comments after somebody's answered, ask a question first. And then make this a safe space for everyone every time. Let's get curious.

Sam 9:26

All right. Who wants to start? I actually had a really hard time with this, believe it or not. I think it's because I had too many to pick from. That was my problem. It wasn't because I don't do it, or Ev is like, which one am I gonna pick?

Rhys 9:44

I'll start with two.

Sam 9:45

Oh, go. Okay.

Golden-Light Meditation And Choosing Positivity

Rhys 9:48

Uh okay. Over the past two years, I've had a a lot of time on my hands. Whether that's a good or bad thing, I'm not sure. But I left my big, big job and have been figuring things out, and so I and I rented my own apartment. And some when you have a lot of time on your hands, your brain gets to work. Oh. And that cannot be great for a especially for a thinker like myself and sometimes an overthinker like myself. So I've had to really kind of like take that creative brain and channel it positively because it it will channel negatively too. So I've been working on brain channeling. Ooh, say more. What? Yes. So two things. One is there's a quote and I can't say it exactly, but it's like your brain will find a thousand reasons to find what's wrong or what's right. It's your choice. And there's two things I do in the morning. One, obviously, meditation, which I know everybody talks about. You have to meditate, you have to meditate, and gosh, I don't like it. Don't like meditation. But I'm like, what does that even mean? Like, am I supposed to sit and dream about beaches and all that? But one thing I have learned is to just tune into the like the sense of light on the inside. Like, I am perpetual soul and perpetual light. And so I sit there and I like visualize this gold light. And then I have the thoughts that come and go around the gold light. And then that is my form of meditation. And it allows me to kind of reconnect that with like no matter what is happening around me or whatever my thoughts are, there is still perpetual consciousness. And perpetual consciousness is truth. That is who I truly am, not worried version of Reese, not how am I gonna make an income Reese, not you know, how am I gonna do X, Y, and Z. And when I can separate perpetual consciousness from stream of thought, then I realize there's like my I can calm down.

Colette 11:48

Yeah.

Rhys 11:49

And my nervous system calms down, and then I can go about my day. No matter the uncertainty. Really?

Sam 11:55

Mm-hmm. That was my question, because I I'm sure that was a because having that ability to to see that good to be in your you know, anxious state to get to even contemplate getting that image in your mind. I'm sure that that's a skill or a like that you had to build up and learn.

Rhys 12:13

Yeah, but I think I've learned that we all have access to it. Yeah. That's what I think there's a power in it, is that like it's not I used to meditate and like have meditations of me and this nice sauna and you know, all the things I really wanted in my life. Um, you know, and just like there would be, you know, this beautiful like woman, and then there would be like, you know, dogs and happy things, and I love all those things, but it wasn't really like getting me anywhere. So then I was like, there's gotta be more to this. And actually I don't even know if I could answer how I got to the golden light thing. It got to you. But it got to me. Yeah. It chose me. And then a second one that I do is whenever I start to think negatively that you can really spiral on negativity is to stop and say, like, we're safe, everything's okay. And then I choose positivity. And I think that's what I've learned is that you have to actively choose to f see the positive in any situation. And that's really hard to do.

Sam 13:14

Well, that's what I was I'm like w has that become easier for you to do the more you've run in?

Rhys 13:19

It has. Because I really really I don't know if you knew me in this, but I was like so negative self-talk, like extremely negative self-talk. Um so I've probably practiced it over like five or six years. Oh I would say. Yeah. Wow. That's that's mine.

Colette 13:38

What would you say has been like in your day-to-day, would you say there's a marked difference in who you are now as opposed to who you were five years ago? Yes. Like, what does that actually look like and feel like for you?

Rhys 13:53

Yeah. Well, I was just telling Sam, um, I just interviewed for this job, and it was awesome to see like how um calm and confident I felt in the conversation. I wasn't looking for them to approve me. Like, I already know I am a leader. I already know I'm a strategic problem solver. I already know that I have a big difference to make in the world. And so when I showed up in that space, it was like I wasn't trying to go in and be like, yo, yo, yo, what up? I'm awesome. It was just like either I'm going to get to use the space as a container to express who I already am, or I'm not. But I'm not looking for you to validate me as the strategic problem solver I already am. Because I am. It's just a matter of is this the space that I want to play in or not. And I think that that is what I've come to see is like um I'm a now I'm an identity expressor, not an identity seeker.

Sam 14:52

When you're in a level playing field then with with the with the people you're coming in, it sounds like, yeah.

Rhys 14:57

Yeah, and I think that that's what's changed is like I'm not looking for the world to external circumstances to validate who I are. So it's like that coming home into yourself, which has been a long journey and it's not over.

Sam 15:10

Oh yeah.

Colette 15:12

Wow.

Sam 15:13

I need to you need to sell that skill because that would solve a lot of problems. Put a lot of pharmaceutical companies out of business. Yeah. But oh my gosh.

Rhys 15:22

And then I can start focusing on the other things, like being like I like podcasting and being playful and having fun, and like it's really hard to do any of that when you are deeply insecure.

Sam 15:32

Yeah. Well, you're you're you're getting your head back into a a space where it can actually solve the the real problem that's going on instead of all the problems that you're creating from this one thing. Oh, that's I gotta talk to you later. Definitely gotta talk to you later.

Rhys 15:49

Who else?

Sam 15:50

Yeah. Not about me. Not about you. No, I have like 40 questions, but yeah, we'd probably need to get to somebody else.

Colette 15:59

Why are y'all looking at me?

Rhys 16:00

Because you are always our why sage. Yes.

Colette 16:04

Look, sometimes the sage dries the hell up and then you gotta set it on fire and smoke it out. You know what I mean?

Sam 16:10

Oh. Um How does one do that?

Colette 16:13

Yeah. I don't know. Um I don't know. I have a the f the as you were talking, the thing that came to mind was actually kind of more like an anti-habit than a habit itself that has radically changed my life. Like I gave up caffeine. I want to say like three years ago. Um and it was kind of a happenstance. I didn't mean to stop drinking caffeine, like it wasn't an intentional choice that I made. Um like one day I went into a coffee shop and they accidentally gave me decaf and I felt so different that that day. Like I didn't have a panic attack, which was like my best friend back then. Um I fell asleep like a baby that night. Like I just I felt so radically different. Um, and then you know, the the detox or the headaches started to come. And so I had to like taper down. But after that one day of being like, why do I feel so different? And then the next day realizing like as I'm drinking my cup of coffee, oh, this tastes different. I think this c I don't I don't think I drank caffeine yesterday. And um so yeah, I never drink caffeine anymore. Um I've there's been a few times that I've used it whenever I'm like when I want that kind of anxiety or that upregulation. Um like if I'm particularly depressed or something, I'll use caffeine to like kind of pick me back up to no avail lessably, but that's fine. Um, but that I like seriously between caffeine and then you know what I'm just gonna talk about microdosing just for a minute. Yeah. That is also something that I did around this time, started doing my microdosing, uh psilocybin, and not every day. It I was on a protocol for like I want to say two or three months. You take it every three days, and then in the middle space you take lion's mane. It's uh for the serotonin. Um, and the combination of going off caffeine, going using psilocybin for three months, but I still take lion's mane every day. That combination of substances um really helped me get past a lot of my major PTSD symptoms. Interesting. I don't have night terrors anymore. Um, I don't have panic attacks, haven't had a panic attack in a long time. Um my anxiety is a lot more improved. Like when you were talking about the the overthinking, I just it's a lot easier for me not to overthink anymore. Yeah. Um I recently realized I probably have ADHD. It does the the the racing thoughts don't race as fast, if that makes any sense. Just kind of like dials it all down, dials it back a bit. Um and I don't know, I also drink a lot more water because I'm not drinking as much coffee. And that of course is gonna help. Um and there's not much that you can drink that isn't co caffeinated in this life. You've probably figured that out too. Oh, yeah. Given though that you only drink still water. Um you drink coffee still, yeah? Oh yeah. Sometimes you can't.

Sam 19:43

Yeah, only one cup though.

Colette 19:45

Right.

Sam 19:45

Yeah. Um and I'm uh it's a gamble.

Colette 19:49

Yeah.

Sam 19:49

Yeah.

Identity From Within, Not Validation

Colette 19:50

Every every morning you're waiting on like, is today gonna be the day that I have a panic attack with coffee? Well, I have a lot to say, yes. Um biggest impact that it um that it's made on my mind uh is my mental health is a lot more improved and what I've with the the psilocybin uh you you're not getting high when you're doing a microdose what it I've noticed that it does so I have chronic pain and it gives me distance from the pain. Interesting. And I recently was um listening to another podcast and there was a book about like microdosing for health about um how it's an anti-inflammatory psilocybin is really studied and approved really that's particularly in in microdose um like if you do a protocol it kind of like reduces the inflammation did your doctor prescribe that yeah my therapists actually it's awesome uh no therapists were doing that um like it's not technically legal oh um but like there's FDA like there are FDA trials clinical trials going on with like MDMA and LSD and I didn't it also depends it's just not legal here right it is legal in several places yeah yeah yeah yeah um and so now that I don't work for the federal government I don't like really give a shit anymore. Yeah well that always helps yeah yeah um that's not something they test for anyways but uh and like I said I only did it for like three months and it radically changed the way that I was able to use the skills that I was learn learning in therapy like doing it by itself right doesn't really do like you need it the combined effect of the two. Exactly the combined effect is super important and talking to my therapist and like this it creates a um a habit in your life where when you take it you're supposed to take it while setting an intention so that you are in a state that kind of um sets your body up to being in that intentional mode rather than just letting whatever anxiety is in you just like come to the surface. But I'm in somatic therapy and that's really important for PTSD treatment is because PTSD takes you into the past um and sometimes even takes you into the future if you have like complex PTSD. And so that constant rumination about anything but the present moment is a big part of it. And somatic therapy teaches you how to be in the moment and I would find in the moments that I needed to be in the moment I had no access like I didn't have the capacity to be in the moment. Right. And psilocybin and the lack of caffeine really the combination of that just gave me more space to be um to be able to use the skills that I was learning in therapy.

Sam 22:50

Wow.

Colette 22:51

It's amazing how much this is a a silly question kind of but how like how much how big of a coffee drinker were you before all this at least three cups a day and for I I had a rule like none after 3 p.m um but I and what I I I should say cups like I'm talking gigantic yeah I've probably I would say I drank twenty four to thirty ounces a day. Oh wow yeah um it was a lot yeah and I I tried just dialing it back at first and I noticed that it still didn't help. Like I was it I think there was a level of that I'd reached a level where that it wasn't helping.

Sam 23:32

Yeah well I wonder I wonder actually because that's what I kind of experienced was uh I actually my my sensitivity to it got significantly lower the longer I tried to do so like that's why I I can only do one cup of coffee. I mean that's a that technically a double shot uh Americano Mercy yeah yeah it's not even a real cup of coffee but even that's yeah I I can't do more than one now either yeah yeah well I know it's caffeine was used a lot of if you know about ADHD stuff. That's been that was a w uh a way that people could access to regulate their ADHD but then yeah there's also drinking it all day which is not a way.

Rhys 24:13

Yeah damn I drink six cups every morning six cups six like four ounce cup eight ounce well I fill the the coffee pot up to six cups and then I drink the whole thing a whole pot of coffee then okay so Reese this is the time in the podcast where we say we actually this isn't an intervention. If you're an overthinker just an addict right I start drinking it by 1 p.m now and I feel fine.

Sam 24:45

Some people are just have giv it's some people are yeah some people psychological tolerance remember everybody's neurology is so different.

Rhys 24:51

I mean I intense that like I I work out like every day and like I coffee and like I'm just that's just I don't know. You might have one of those systems. I I think I have a bit of like a positive addictive personality. Like I'm not addicted to anything bad except for coffee and running.

Colette 25:06

Like we're just talking about I can't even drink half of a Coke without being without maybe I've just been doing it way too long. Yeah I I think at this point it's been three years that since I like got off the juice and I even just like I can start to feel the effects of caffeine you know with maybe a quarter of a Coke.

Sam 25:31

Yeah. And you discovered this all by accident really.

Colette 25:35

Yeah the caffeine thing by accident and then as we were talking I I like I brought it to my therapist and I was like I've been dealing with this and she's a somatic person and she was like I really like this direction that you're headed and you are tuned in enough to your body that I think psilocybin might help you. Oh that's how it okay that's kind of how that happened and then additional on the same line of substances is how I got into working with a Chinese medicine doctor um and doing acupuncture. I've done acupuncture it's so good.

Rhys 26:05

What does it do for y'all?

Marla 26:08

Maybe some of the same things we've discussed already that you know it just frees you up, gets you out of your head, gets me out of the past actually it it allows me to focus on the present and be in tune with my body. So feeling all of those sensations and um you know being connected to the present. In addition to just the the physical health benefits but um I only I only had a couple of sessions but but they were uh pretty remarkable in terms of the effects.

Sam 26:36

I had no idea that it had a like a mental state effect. I thought it was just physical.

Marla 26:41

Oh no it definitely is a mental or at least for me it did.

Colette 26:43

Well this book about microdosing talks about how a lot of our health issues are related to inflammation. Like inflammation is a big reason for a lot of our our health issues. Yeah um our diets don't help our American diets don't help no not at all and so yeah like the more inflammation you have the more likely you are to be depressed or anxious. Like your whole system is hot and unregulated or upregulated I should say and it's um you stay in that state. And so yeah whenever I get acupuncture for my fibromyalgia and psoriatic arthritis the last time I or a few times ago I went in there because I was so fatigued like I couldn't think straight. I had the most insane brain fog um I go in she puts she land she first she does a bloodletting on one of my one of my joints and I and she was like I don't know why this works it just does.

Sam 27:38

Is that a literal thing you're talking about?

Ditching Caffeine And Microdosing For Healing

Colette 27:40

Yeah she literally did a bloodletting like right here on that top joint and it's just a slightly bigger needle than they usually put in for acupuncture. But then she did it on my like she put needles in my scalp yeah my feet my hands I lay down on that table like I was going through life half asleep and I woke up like I got up and I felt like a totally different person. Like I finally woke up that day. Yeah yeah and then yeah the the herbs I can tell whenever I'm not on them and like you're not supposed to be on them all the time and right now I'm kind of like tapering off. Um but I have been dealing with not being medicated on my Western meds uh because of insurance and blah blah blah and the healthcare system's a piece of shit. Um and so I was just on herbs and the herbs are the only reason I was able to get up and function every day. Did she make an herb concoction for you? Yeah that's awesome. Yeah hidden root acupuncture here in New Orleans Sarah Welsh I'm just gonna plug her I I get no no benefit from that she's at uh at Hidden Root New Orleans yeah okay yeah it'll be in the show notes our promo code is a letter you heard that person off of your person but she is amazing and you heard that first here folks well at least us Marla I'll go.

Sam 29:12

I'll go see I feel like mine's so pedantic now but uh well actually what you said you are pedantic I know that I no I would say that about myself uh well no because uh you actually said something that um I'm not gonna that's not my thing but uh I uh I had the same problem as you did Reese with like meditation like it's just like what am I doing here? I'm basically just talking to myself. Yeah you know and uh and which is like don't need that more in my life. But then um I ran into one uh uh one leader that I was reading about he's actually a really really good philosopher s uh slash theologian and he and he talked about the same thing he had pro problems with it and uh and he discovered uh I can't remember the exact term but um what he termed it as is imaginative uh meditation or prayer and now see for me who had my mind was always you know this was so much easier to focus my mind in and so I did something very similar I had the same place image thing I went to and uh now that's why I was interested in like how long it took you to build that because like I don't I'm so not good at it now but I'm just like wondering if if I leaned into it like the what you said like it would I would have the same results. So anyways that was my side note.

Rhys 30:34

Yeah because I think the point is to give your brain a break from thinking. Yes. And I found that imaginative if that's um what you were referring to like it was like I was it was work.

Sam 30:45

I had to work. Well there's a different well Colette and I talk talk about creativity a lot and it's like there is create when you're being creative and it's just it's like a stone. It's not fun. It's not there's no life in it. But then when you're like generative creating you know that's when you're when you're creating something like positive that fills space positively like you did this energy this comes. But anyways that was my uh one thing but the the and this is so stereotypical but what I uh started to do that that really has changed my life dramatically was was uh I don't have my phone around me after that spectrum yeah five o'clock I don't and what's a problem because then you know I actually do maybe want to talk to some friends or family or whatever. But and so I try to make sure I do that. But um I I thought it was such a you know stupid thing to do. You know I was like who cares? You know you have your phone around do this and that and then I was like I don't want to be one of those people you know where I put my phone away but I had just come to a place where I was just like so like on all the time. Yes. And and um and I just and I remember the first time I put it away and I didn't even know what was going on I I started to feel really better you know and and more present. I um wasn't looking down at my phone all the time while I'm watching a movie or you know stuff like that. And uh and it actually kind of proliferated to other parts of my life too because I'm like man like I don't need to be reached at all times. You know and I don't need and I and I don't need to know everything all the time.

Colette 32:33

Right.

Sam 32:33

You know or I don't I need to have you know like some restrictions where it's just like oh it's me and my work or me and you know whatever. And um but then that started to spill over to other things too it is like man how am I spending my present time like what am I focusing on and you know talking about yeah with your thoughts going you know doing negative creative and creativity stuff. But um yeah that all started with like putting away a phone and then it did spill over to like other technology and where uh I got to the point actually where I'll purposely sit in a room uh with no sound no nothing and I I try to get bored.

Colette 33:16

Oh gosh yeah you know that's terrifying to me well no because you know I want to get with you bored being bored it what a luxury what a luxury because because we're so stimulated all the time.

Sam 33:32

Okay. And then just be like like because I I'll pr in in a weird way it's it's actually even though if I never get bored I never get bored. But um it actually helps my body like relax. Yeah and and be in the space I'm in and not have to be stimulated or be engaged. And once again it just helps me see like oh actually there's a lot of interesting stuff going on around me you know which is me just replacing it with something else but at least it's real you know if that makes any sense.

Marla 34:05

Is it possible to be still and not bored? Because I don't know that I find boredom but I do love stillness.

Sam 34:12

Yeah I would you know that's what's funny because that's that's what I was feeling when I was saying like how I feel is um does it does it increate inculcate a sense of stillness when you're yeah which which then is interesting yeah in a in a generative positive way so I don't get bored of sitting there and just oh yeah just taking it all in yeah well you feel different things you experience different things so yeah it was uh that was a big thing for me big big thing some of I don't know about you Sam but some of my best ideas came out of being bored. Oh yeah yeah well I of you know it's the old adage of like if you're working on a problem and you can't fix it just walk away from it and I've started I learned a new practice. Yeah that is well then it's all and it's always when I'm doing something completely totally something else.

Marla 35:04

Yeah or you know I think Elizabeth Gilbert mentioned that in Big Magic her book about creativity. If you're a writer and you're having writer's block or you're a painter and you can't think of the next composition go do something else. Yeah right go garden. And then often you know that that eureka insight comes to you and you're able to get recharged to reinvigorate it to to tackle that that issue again. Yeah.

Rhys 35:29

Yeah I think also something you said that I've come to realize this here too is for people who are doers and go getters and also this just hyper stimulated world that we live in, it can feel um like not safe for something to just sit. Yeah. And but you we see where that's brought us as a world. And so it's like at an individual level that's why meditation is good because you're signaling to your nervous system it's okay. Yeah. And it's safe to just be here now. Yeah. And that's like a practice. That's not just something that happens. No.

Marla 36:10

And so just sitting in a room Yeah it seems like there's a lot of deep programming too that has to happen with that because because of how we're acclimated to be busy and thinking and doing all of the time. Yeah. And so to literally like pull ourselves away from that to retract and be still and be quiet and and and thoughtful it's it's an anomaly really. Yeah.

Rhys 36:32

I thought it was weird when I I'm sorry well a real quick like how um in our society we're told well you get um two weeks of vacation crazy or a week to go to the beach and that's where you're allowed to relax but the other 360 days of the year. Yeah. And I was like what? Yeah but it took me stepping out of that to realize how not natural that is yeah right you know but it's really hard when everybody else is doing it.

Marla 37:00

Right. And the Europeans get like a muff. Yeah and like they will fight you if you take that muff away.

Colette 37:06

As they should be up in arms because we should fight more exactly right exactly yeah yeah with the the phone like putting away the phone do you feel like that's kind of reset your attention span at all?

Sam 37:20

You know that's interesting. I don't I don't know I would say yes but I don't know I'm gonna think about it. Oh look a squirrel yeah well no I'm just well uh no I wonder what it's I'm just trying to think because I I do feel like it's reorient reoriented my just without I'm just totally riffin but it's reoriented it to be more um uh oh gosh what am I saying like spend more time on something yeah does that make any sense which is attention which is a weird thing to me but it's like because I'll just jump to stuff.

Colette 37:54

Right.

Sam 37:54

And um but it but now it takes you know these all these thoughts I have all the time I'll stop and spend time more on like oh that's an interesting one. And actually what made me uh the image that came to my mind when you were asking the question too was uh what happens now when I'm like even doing something as silly as watching TV with Morgan or whatever. Uh you know before I'd be on my phone not even maybe not even paying attention or I'm looking up oh like who's that actor and you know not being an art of it. Um I get the I mean I really do enjoy that better and actually have more creative conversations and we have fun conversations with it without an involving all that. So yeah it does it does impact my attention. I never thought about that.

Colette 38:35

Yeah. Well it just makes me think some of my coworkers think it's kind of strange. Whenever I'm doing deep work I'm not on my computer.

Sam 38:42

Yeah.

Colette 38:43

Like if if I'm doing a big strategic planning something it's on paper and pen. Yeah you know um or you know uh last two weeks ago I was like I think I need a sandbox. Oh uh in the military there's this um practice of doing a sand table of the you know of the the conflict zone or whatever and literal yeah a literal sand table um that they like create the geography and okay and all and something we learned in basic training but I'm like I wish I had a sand table for what I'm doing right now. Um and I was like maybe I maybe I just go to the riverside or something.

Sam 39:20

I couldn't find sand um enough sand for in Louisiana I guess that you could play with yeah that's not gross.

Acupuncture, Herbs, And Inflammation

Colette 39:27

Um so yeah that's that's why I asked I was like that I think we are more capable of depth of work rather than the variety of work whenever we're like unplugged from all that stimulus yeah yeah I would agree.

Rhys 39:43

I think the future is going to go to those who can focus oh yeah that's what I think are already becoming a rare bead because it's yeah our brains are extremely powerful machines and we're feeding it constant distraction. And so it's going to neurologically program that.

Colette 40:04

Yeah.

Rhys 40:05

And so I and not even like the power of the but the influence, the true influence, I think is going to come from those who are capable of focus. Oh yeah. Deep focus.

Colette 40:15

Well I just think about what my algorithm sometimes it's so I've Instagram I kind of cu for a while curated around a s specific kind of content that was like soothing and calming. Um but then your friends algorithms start to affect yours.

Marla 40:31

That's true.

Colette 40:32

And the more I send things to a put uh you know particular friends, the more I'm now getting stuff that I never wanted on in my content. Oh. It's like this distractions and the new I've I've never been much of a news person when it comes to social media. So yeah it's and it's like I kind of want my old algorithm back.

Marla 40:52

Yeah. What is we all want the old algorithm I want I want Instagram when it was just pictures. Yeah. And no reels.

Rhys 40:58

We can literally with parking lag. We have like a curious career that's like what is your algorithm like yeah because mine's like all golden retrievers. Dogs. I could mine too basketball and motivation.

Colette 41:12

Yeah.

Sam 41:13

I mean you could sell that I'm interested I buy it. Like underhead you could sell your own algorithm we just developed a new income screen. Well copyright yeah well I guess uh you're left. Yeah yeah what do you think what do you got Marla?

Marla 41:30

Oh goodness I've had so many um you know and it's interesting I was talking with someone recently about um we were talking about habits actually there's a book called Atomic Habits I like that book full of insights um but it could be that you also outgrow habits that are no longer needed. I feel like you know when I was younger I was an avid reader um and that helped to to center me and you know get me out of my own head and into other worlds. And I think it also helps to build empathy and compassion. Absolutely research shows that that is yeah I think I I think you may have told us that um but I I've exhausted that habit though it was a good one. I mean I I do write uh and read poetry I I won't I will continue to do that. Um but I paint I paint on the weekends and so I am very guarded about that time. Um I I it's been a source of um frustration for my family and my friends because I'm not as accessible but it is necessary it's a necessary uh strategy to be able to guard and um protect my time and my personal space um and it's a creative outlet aside from all of the psychological benefits of of you know any sort of art form. Yeah as you mentioned earlier the genitive creative spirit. And so yeah I would say painting um writing uh I write all the time I write for my job uh those those are the habits that have really helped to develop me and I and I say reading more so because um from an area very early age our father encouraged us to do that and you know obviously it opens up worlds. I come from a very small town uh and so i there just wasn't a whole lot of offerings in the way of you know cultural events and yeah uh you know extracurricular extracurricular curricular activities and so reading was the outlet it was the way to connect with um other people and other ideas and other perspectives um very early on and I I have to say I mean I've I've learned so much about self as a result of it. Yeah so yeah I think that you know habits can certainly fade over time um and not necessarily don't necessarily need substitutions but uh I I've just grown into different habits and and newer habits that have that are working for me now at the time.

Sam 43:56

Practices almost it seems like yeah yeah yeah that sounds like a whole series of practices. Well especially the painting on the weekend that's a I it's a practice.

Marla 44:06

Unless we're traveling or we're you know we have something else uh you know on the calendar as an engagement I I I I don't miss my painting. Yeah I don't I I don't miss my painting sessions.

Sam 44:18

So uh I uh okay this is I don't know this world so it might be asking too personal question. But it's like what like what is that like I don't know what your space two days or like you know what if it but like what what does like that time look like for you? Do you have a structure to it or like that's a very good question.

Marla 44:36

Not necessarily um either it'll be an all day paint day or it'll be a few hours on a Saturday and a few hours on a Sunday.

Sam 44:45

Okay.

Marla 44:46

Because I mean obviously life has to go on I have to go grocery shopping and I have to do things. Yeah yeah but um but it'll look like one or the other like an all day yeah just six to eight hour you know grind um and and though it doesn't feel like a grind to me like it's it's it's it's luxury for me or I'll split it up and and after that I feel like I can go into my Monday you know ready to ready to hit the world.

Sam 45:14

Do you like walk into the room and just start painting or do you have a coffee? Do you have music? Do you what what happens?

Marla 45:20

Yeah there's some ritualistic elements to it you know there's some structure around it. Um I will say that you know like most artists I have to warm up. Yeah so I'll start with a drawing or something really small and then build into a bigger piece. Uh the warm-ups are important. And yeah um I'll light a candle often a simple candle and um I have to have music or very rarely do I put on a podcast. It's most often music.

Sam 45:44

Okay playlist what is what it's on the playlist all over the place.

Marla 45:48

It's just all over the place. Um you know jazz classical uh indie pop okay I mean I sometimes I put on print sometimes I put on shroaka con maybe just varies all over the place.

Sam 46:02

So we can put your like your playlist like in this this episode you know like so people can hear your your your that'd be nice. Yeah that'd be interesting. Who don't know it sounds good.

Marla 46:12

Yeah my dad mom and dad had quite an album collection growing up so I like to think I have some taste when it comes to musical influences.

Sam 46:19

Oh I'm telling you yeah I mean I think getting exposed to music so early like the diversity of music really does impact your life. Oh it really does.

Marla 46:27

Yeah it does yeah um and so yeah I would say that those are like the the habits that have really really uh helped deform me and I'm I'm very uh grateful for them.

Phone-Free Evenings And The Value Of Boredom

Sam 46:38

Yeah. How long ago did you start doing that?

Marla 46:41

So it's funny I started as a scrapbooker about 12 years ago. Oh that evolved into art journaling and then art journal journaling evolved into painting I would say about four years ago. And I was a I'm gonna say a a play painter like a Mickey Mouse painter four years ago. Now I'm more serious. Now I'm I'm I'm leaning into the professional vein.

Sam 47:02

And so did you take I mean one I did take a painting class.

Marla 47:06

Okay. Yeah took an oil painting class. But I mean a lot of what I um have acquired has been through YouTube University. What really you learned so much on YouTube. It's amazing and so while I'm not on my cell phone or on television I'm on YouTube.

Sam 47:21

So maybe that's my addiction to my we gotcha we gotcha YouTube.

Marla 47:29

But yeah I mean it's been a progression you know just uh accumulating skills along the way and and and most painters will say like you're never gonna be uh a master at painting it's it's always something new to learn you're always getting better um so I I do feel like I have a lot to learn but I have uh I've I've I've met certain milestones.

Sam 47:52

Were you surprised I came out of you this drawing painting?

Marla 47:56

No, actually um it it's like um I tell someone becoming a painter now is like um akin to to coming out of the closet.

Colette 48:08

Oh.

Marla 48:08

It would be like if I um had known I was you know gay from a young child but I was not able to you know fully express my gayness. And then at some point you realize okay I've been this way my whole life so now I can really live this way. Oh I've been the closeted painter my whole life. I should have been a painter and had to do other things. And so now that I can paint I fully feel like I've come into who I am supposed to be if that makes sense.

Rhys 48:40

And that's what is beautiful about art.

Colette 48:43

Yeah what do you think kept you from you said spell you know last four years you said you've been painting or it's kind of been a progression over time but like the your metaphor kind of begs the question of like what kept you from being a painter sooner.

Marla 48:58

Life life choices uh parenting yeah uh but uh family um uh how can I say this trying to fulfill the desires and wishes of family uh oh yeah such a big one which makes sense like why they are kind of put off by you protecting this time oh yeah oh we yeah we yeah it those conversations did not go well at first yeah when I told them that I started painting yeah yeah what yeah absolutely you know um and so I I I played that role you know I followed that script of you know getting two degrees and uh was not satisfied and and then also I was a single mother for a very long time and I had to work and so uh yeah I mean that I had to put all that on the back burner and and and now that I'm an empty nester and um I've come into my own and and who I am and think I the way that I should be living I I just felt like it was a uh it it was no longer serving me to deny that part of myself yeah that that was in essence the very core of who I was yeah um you know I I you you think about these like um stories of alternate realities like people saying well if I hadn't had that experience would I have gone down that road you know I I often think about that like what if I'd started this like what if I'd gone and gotten the fine art degree right out of high school and started painting early where would I be now and you know it's easy to bemoan what didn't happen but uh I I'm just glad it finally happened. Yeah you know because I can die with some peace.

Colette 50:42

Well I kind of you're this reminds me a lot of my journey with clown I feel that same way that um it's similar to my coming out journey as being queer that it's like I've always been a clown but I never gave myself permission to be the clown that I knew that I wanted to be right um and that I knew that it was in me right until I decided to quit the script and be the weirdo, the eccentric who's like makes people question what do you mean when you're a clown you say you're a clown. You know like it's a weird weird thing. Right. And I've and but I now that I'm connected to other clowns who are of my same age and they did do the whole they got an MFA they are traditionally trained and dah dah da um the thing that they've told me that's different about my experience of clown to theirs is that I don't have as much ego attached to it because it's not dependent upon my livelihood. Oh I can totally see that. And so I don't know maybe that's a gift uh to to both of us is that like we have less a little less ego attached to our art because we haven't attached it to capitalism.

Marla 51:52

I would agree that and also I feel like I have more creative license and largesse. Yeah. Because I I don't I didn't have um sort of a uh a delineated curricula and path and I wasn't trained under any in under any particular artist or professor. So I don't I'm not painting like you know uh I'm trying to think of a really cool uh Keehan Wiley I wasn't trained under him so I wouldn't be painting like that yeah so I could really bring my own voice and my own imagination and my own spirit to the work. Yeah so I would I would totally agree with that.

Colette 52:28

Yeah.

Marla 52:29

Certainly no ego but I I feel like I have I'm all over the place. I have full creative license in ways that other artists might restrain themselves.

Colette 52:35

Yeah. Well I was I was texting Sam I realized I was reorganizing my own art space and I found actually it's 17 different clowns 17 I've created 17 different clown personas in 18 months. Wow really from the time when I was like starting doing that to to now no maybe it's a little closer to two years but yeah and when I've talked to some of the other clowns they were like how? Yeah what do you do it's because you don't have the scripts no like we we had our script we had our own distinct scripts that kept us away from this path but when you're on that path there there comes other scripts right that you have to be a certain kind of in my case certain kind of clown certain kind of painter correct in order to be considered like successful in that world. Right and yeah and well after talking with them it's like yeah this is a gift that I never attached this to a job. Yeah yeah because what I the job I do have, I attached too much my identity to it net you know right then of course I would do that with this other thing. Right. So it's just a different it's it would just be a different script that we would be following. Absolutely if we went down the traditional path of the MFA and the all of the right traditional path yeah stuff. Yeah yeah with the arts. Latent with a lot of headaches by the way.

Sam 53:57

Yeah yeah so yeah sometimes I wonder about that with formal education you know I'm not talking about mentorship or anything like that because you know that's important or apprenticeship or whatever but yeah we you you never realize when you're going through all of that education you're still getting kind of put in a certain stream or a box and what's respectable. Yeah and and these you're already building structures in your brain about how your creative creativity can come out.

Marla 54:27

Yeah.

Sam 54:27

You know where it's it's it's nice to see because I've seen it you know with a few people actually even in business that people that don't approach the world like or even has this quote unquote formal training.

Colette 54:39

Right.

Sam 54:39

And just um I don't know how else to say it uh you know the their intuition yes you know their their or their self I guess you could you know really what we're saying just knows yeah what to do and they can they can be creative and they're like wait a minute how's he doing that? He shouldn't be doing that and because well but he didn't go to business school.

Colette 55:00

Right.

Marla 55:01

You know he didn't he you got didn't you know you could do that but you didn't because you told you you were couldn't you you couldn't so yeah I mean you get like you get locked in you know into an institutional framework but but also those institutions are are made of hierarchies.

Sam 55:16

Yeah.

Marla 55:16

And so you know you're beholden to the framework itself and the hierarchies and so it's hard to move. And then of course you go from there to a career track.

Colette 55:24

Right.

Marla 55:25

And it's very narrow and siloed. But like my dad, you know, who didn't get to go to college and was autodidactic, uh you know had a a much fuller range and an expanse of the human experience I felt. And was reading Shakespeare and you know I didn't get to Shakespeare till I got to college. You know so it's it's that sort of stuff um that uh makes you think that you know institutions are certainly deficient in and of themselves but but knowledge as as a good a sort of a of an actual public good in and of itself um can be explored and you know those boundaries can be pushed and it can be you know the full range of that can be explored if you're allowed to do that yeah on your own terms. Yeah making your own rules.

Colette 56:12

And I think that's why YouTube University is so great because it's so great. And teaching in generating in general it's like yeah it just puts the knowledge out there for anyone who has the the curiosity to follow it like it's there. For all the ills of the internet I do appreciate the kind of globalization of knowledge. Absolutely I and I'm sure there's knowledge that hasn't made it to the internet right not everything can be digitized and and monetized or whatever but like it's such a gift having gone through all the traditional education and done all that um I've had people ask me so what are you gonna what are you gonna do next? Where are you gonna go to school next? I'm like I'm not going to school oh so you're done learning and I'm like no someone's actually said that to you seriously yeah wow I'm like have you met me? Like of course I was like I just want to read what I want to read I want to learn what I want to learn.

Marla 57:10

Yeah yeah this is why I always you know envied those kids that were homeschooled you know I don't know that like I think that social emotional learning can be overrated you know this whole notion of socialization um you know there are ways to cultivate that but like kids who are homeschooled I mean I was a free range kid I wasn't homeschooled but like that's like true exploration of knowledge in its purest form.

Creativity, Depth Work, And Focus

Colette 57:35

Yeah and and there are no boundaries to it right like homeschool kids can learn I mean they can you know study history today and math tomorrow yeah there are no boundaries it's it's just uh a limitless sort of terrain and so uh all the homes school kids that I knew in college were so much smarter than the same yeah my college roommate was homeschooled and she was like totally acing it on on some of her nursing classes because she had taken like medical terminology Latin oh my gosh like 15 or whatever you're because she knew she wanted to be a nurse and and I think that's the cool thing too about all alternative modes of education is that kids get to learn not what is expected or what is considered socially acceptable to learn but instead they're learning what they want to learn in order to get where they want to get absolutely and I think that's really cool.

Rhys 58:27

Yeah I do think the world's changing a little bit in the direction of supporting that too which is I've been exploring graduate school some and um even like um University of Denver is like they're trying to figure out flex paths they call them so paths that allow you yeah to like when I was going through school in 2011 or whatever it was like dual degree. Okay, cool, but even that was weird.

Colette 58:52

Yeah.

Rhys 58:53

But now it's just like no that's not weird at all and it's not even binary. It's kind of just like you can cross um digital media and journalism with international relations and global affairs with a focus and diplomacy. Yeah. So like the renaissance person in me who just like needs to know everything is very much about that. And I think that's really um I think that's when society does work best is especially when younger generations start coming into the workforce and all that and they have these expectations of like no I want to know for example like how does my work make a difference you know beyond just kind of like cookie cutter box like yeah we have DEI here which obviously is in question right now but like no it's like how do you actually have social responsibility integrated into your work? Yeah. And I think also COVID accelerated that a lot where people just started to like be like what the oh yeah am I doing with my life? Like oh yeah you know it reprioritized what actually really matters.

Colette 59:55

Um I'm actually curious does anyone have a COVID like hot Copy earth habit that has like helicon for you after.

Rhys 1:00:03

Yeah, introversion. I'm not even kidding. Stay at home. Stay at home. Don't leave the house. No, I'm just kidding. No, but like I'm an extrovert, but I think I'm more of an what is that? Ambed whatever ambition is. Ambia is it? It really brought forth the introversion in me of like like you're saying, having art just so beautiful and like things that stimulate us and bring us energy and yeah.

Marla 1:00:30

Yeah, I'm an introvert. Um, so COVID just worked right into that alley. Yeah. I was an introvert. But I will say that I look at roses more. I had a rose bush that I would just look at daily and I and I I would I I was attuned to the birds music, the bird sounds, because I'd wake up early and I could hear the birds. Normally I'm at work uh and are getting ready for work, and so I miss the birds. So I will go into the park and look at the rose bushes and listen to the birds. Yes, something new that I do.

Rhys 1:00:58

That's a good one too.

Marla 1:00:59

Yeah.

Rhys 1:00:59

I do bird watch too. I'm like, are we getting older? You're like, what's happening? Yeah, what's happened?

Marla 1:01:03

The birds now. It's bird music.

Sam 1:01:05

I just picked up catastrophizing. That's all I picked up. And I'm I'm just now putting down I'm past the hobby. You know, I'm past it.

Rhys 1:01:15

What is happening? The world is coming to an end. I mean, it really diet.

Sam 1:01:19

Yeah.

Rhys 1:01:19

Yeah, it really did.

Sam 1:01:20

In a way, and I'm not in a way, I'm not joking. I kind of picked that up, but yeah, I'm just trying to put that away.

Colette 1:01:25

I'm just so fascinated by what people picked up during COVID because I worked in a hospital on COVID floors during COVID. And so, like people who talk about being cooped up and all of that, I'm like, can't relate. Um really, really can't relate. And yeah, it's just fascinating to me what people picked up. Yeah, yeah, because so many artistic hobbies got picked up. Like crochet and knitting in particular.

Sam 1:01:48

So many people. Morgan picked that up. Yeah. Yep.

Colette 1:01:51

Yeah. Yep. Cross stitch embroidery, like the fiber arts, I feel like are finally having their moment to shine. And I love it. Me. I love it.

Sam 1:01:59

I love that I just heard those two words together for the first time in my life. What fiber art? Fiber arts.

Marla 1:02:04

You've never heard of them?

Sam 1:02:05

No.

Marla 1:02:05

Oh, it's a that is I feel swine. Fiber arts.

Sam 1:02:10

Or you could say, Welcome to the club. You know, I just cultured swine.

Rhys 1:02:16

What is this? Shakespeare? I mean, Hamlet.

Sam 1:02:19

Someone is quoting it.

Rhys 1:02:21

It's a quote with whips. Well, they definitely got that from Shakespeare. Yeah.

Colette 1:02:25

Yeah, I don't know.

Rhys 1:02:26

Oh, that's good. Oh my gosh.

Colette 1:02:28

I got it from Toy Story because I'm an uncultured swine. Oh, I love that. I'm so calling that somebody's an uncultured swine.

Sam 1:02:36

Oh my gosh. Well, it's kind of crazy. Uh I I was um I just uh kind of inside track here. When I uh when I did this question, when I put it out to vote, I've I spent some time uh recently taking all the questions that you know we have and kind of categorizing them. Okay, hotter questions, and like super spicy questions, meaning like like I that I deemed you know more in-depth or could lead to this and that. And uh this and I what I my goal was to always make one from each available at the vote. Right. So people can like if you guys want to do this, you want to do that, whatever. And like folks picked this one, and I was like, okay, we're gonna just we're just gonna go light, right?

Colette 1:03:24

Right.

Sam 1:03:24

But then I thought about it, I was like, actually, no.

Colette 1:03:27

No, you're getting a like you just asked the poor Marla all the questions about her free time are called free time, and what does that look like? That's a pretty intimate question. I feel it as you were asking.

Sam 1:03:39

Yeah, I was like, I feel like I should ask permission.

Colette 1:03:42

Yeah, you know. Yeah, it feels so sacred. Like the things that we do really every day can be sacred.

Marla 1:03:49

Well, they can be, and you know, what's interesting is that how often do we get opportunities to talk about our sacred time? No. I mean, when you go into a workplace, I mean you're I mean, at least for me, the workplace is like, I don't know, like I become an automaton, like I I get cut off from myself, and you know, you what's the point of a workplace, honestly?

Rhys 1:04:08

See, this is what I'm terrified of. I don't want to get cut off from myself again.

Marla 1:04:11

Yeah. I do not know the point of the workplace now, you know. Maybe when I was younger, making enough money to retire. That's the point of the workplace.

Sam 1:04:19

Literally what we talked about while I get into it.

Marla 1:04:22

Old, you know. Yeah, it gets to be old. And so no, this is great. This is like an opportunity to talk about like what we do outside of work and this at this time.

Sam 1:04:31

Well, because I think our culture I mean, you and I are definitely f we're from the same generation. Oh, yes. And I think that's proud, proud genuine. Yeah, but it's like it was just we didn't really talk about that. Like what like you're well, I mean, I guess people had hobbies, quote unquote.

Marla 1:04:47

But you're too busy socializing and going to bars and getting cheap beer and you know, going to dance clubs and um, you know, and working every now and again.

Sam 1:04:58

Yeah, working. Yeah. Or or doing all of that and working at the same time and just because you know what?

Marla 1:05:04

It was so affordable to go to college then that I don't even think I worked in college. Like my daughter had to work all through college. My parents took care of me in college. And they weren't rich.

Sam 1:05:14

Yeah, we could yeah, they could.

Marla 1:05:16

My tuition was so affordable, right? And then I had like, you know, Pell Grant and what have you. And so I could just go to debate club or like hang out in the quad or whatever, you know. It was we were we were so we I think we were much more enamored with each other because we had a social matrix that was a bit of like devices.

Sam 1:05:34

Yeah. I've my my experience was a little bit more like, yeah, I I it was there was no talk of like your hobbies or your fun time. You worked, you did this is what you did. And and so uh it's been weird to like try to and actually when you were talking about the I haven't had this experience yet, but you guys are giving me like some clues, like maybe I should think about this. But um, like how I'm you know getting more uh you know, understanding more about myself and my creative self and all that kind of stuff. I was like, and uh there's like there's there is that language I'm like maybe I'm there's something I've always been and I don't know yet, and but I think I put it away.

Colette 1:06:14

Are you finally gonna take a clown class? Is you finally signing up for Greek.

Sam 1:06:19

This is literally Collette the clown evangelist. Yeah.

Colette 1:06:25

Yes. Well, you talked about wrestling and wrestling is that shit's clown.

Sam 1:06:29

I know this. We've talked about this, we've talked about this.

Colette 1:06:32

It's also drag.

Sam 1:06:33

I'm not my version.

Rhys 1:06:35

Not my version. I don't think Samuel's ready for this moment.

Colette 1:06:38

You can give him less wrestling is performing masculinity. That is what it is.

Sam 1:06:42

Yeah, speechcraft. Oh, yeah. Oh, I know. I loved it. Love it.

Colette 1:06:48

You always ask me when's the next clown show? And like you're like hooked on it. You are a clown. I'm telling you.

Rhys 1:06:53

Well, we'll see. We'll see. I can't. I'm meant to be a gay man backup dancer for like I don't know who, but that's who I'm supposed to be. That's awesome. That is me. I could that is like I have got to let that part of me out. Really? Oh, yes. Going back to like you were always an artist. Like, I have always been a dancer? A dancer. Oh, that's I just haven't had the cultural support and the familial support and the understanding that that's what I'm supposed to do. What do you do in your life? What are you doing? I know. That's that's just gotta do it. I know you did so that that's part of my goals this year. So it's just like if that fuel is in you, you've got to do what's right.

Sam 1:07:34

I really do believe like every single person like alive has that something, that creative something in them. Yeah. Like not together. Yeah, and just that just just wants to create something.

Rhys 1:07:45

Because we were created by a creator, no matter what. Yeah, no matter it's not some not I'm not talking necessarily sentient being. Right.

Marla 1:07:52

Like there is a creator.

Painting Weekends And Protecting Sacred Time

Rhys 1:07:53

Yes. Yeah. And it we all name it differently, but like we were created. Yeah. And so we are creation, so we want to further create. Our natural state is to create. Yeah. Yeah.

Marla 1:08:04

The making ape, they call us. Back to ape my ape.

Sam 1:08:07

There we go again. And it comes full circle. Look at you, Mark. This is your this is your wasn't is this your first time on a podcast? And you like are like professional. Where's your podcast coming out, Marlon? What are you doing?

Marla 1:08:20

I don't know. It's like my inner painter. I guess I got an inner painter. Oh my gosh.

Sam 1:08:24

You're the new Bob Ross.

Marla 1:08:27

Oh my gosh. Yeah.

Sam 1:08:28

Well, you could Bob Ross.

Marla 1:08:31

But just a little bit more like, you know, flair.

Sam 1:08:34

Yeah. Of course. What are you talking about?

Marla 1:08:36

Bob Ross is the painter of the 70s. We need a painter of like 2026.

Sam 1:08:39

Duh. What am I talking about?

Colette 1:08:42

Bring the energy.

Rhys 1:08:45

But who was saying, who said it's like the world has enough whatever it's like. Anyway. But we are like, we don't need more people who want to sign up to do what people have always done in leadership positions and all this. We need more people who want to know who they are and go do that thing. Yeah. That's right. Because when that happens on a large scale, the world will become a better place because we're not constantly chasing what will help me fit in, what is ego, what is power. It's like, no, who am I? Yeah. And there is a beauty in that that's magnetic. And so it's like, if we all did that, what would the world look like?

Sam 1:09:28

Well, there's a necessity of it. Do you see what I'm like that's the way the the world is that's the natural state of the world, is what you're talking about. And so it's a it's it's that's why I think there's more and more of that happening. It's just naturally progressing there. People are starting to discover that about themselves.

Rhys 1:09:44

Yeah, and it's not just to the it's not just for the 1%. No. It's like we all inherently are creative beings. Absolutely. With a purpose, or at least I believe that. Like we are here for a certain reason. Like and when you can live into that, and it really doesn't matter the other stuff. No. Like if I can live into being a dancer, being a podcaster, being like a community leader in my own right, like I have accomplished my dream.

Marla 1:10:12

Absolutely.

Rhys 1:10:12

And maybe there's more I haven't even learned yet. Like I think I actually would be a really good um woodworker. Oh, yeah. Like I love like I love I love like that Jesus was a woodworker. I'm no no lot. Hands on, like what a badass, like a carpenter. And I'm like, if I could for some reason I just get so energized by this idea of like Jesus being this carpenter and molding this gorgeous wooden chalice instead of like this ornate silver chalice. And I think there's this thing in me that's like very drawn to that. So here I hear it already.

Sam 1:10:45

Chalice by Reese.

Rhys 1:10:46

There is. You know that I I can that's the that's the commercial.

Sam 1:10:50

Wooden chalices by Reese. Everybody needs one. Well, you do.

Rhys 1:10:55

I mean, I think anyway.

Sam 1:10:56

So No, and all kinds uh this is a short one. It's funny you said Wordberg um a former student, and we still always uh talk. He's uh he's an old country boy. And he I uh he's just a great kid. Guy, he's a man. But uh but uh he's not a kid anymore. I'm just just because he's 20 years younger than me. But out of nowhere, he sends me this picture and uh he just decides to start whittling.

Rhys 1:11:20

What is whittling?

Sam 1:11:21

It's woodworking. Oh it is, yeah, it's hand carved little I know, yeah. And so but but once again, he's he's one of those type of guys where he didn't go to any formal education. He's just some dude out in the woods, like, what's this? Pick this up, pick that up. And he sent me a picture. I'll show it to you after we're done. Maybe I'll even post it uh in this. But he create I was like, What did you make?

Colette 1:11:41

Yeah, yeah.

Sam 1:11:42

Like it and I he it it was like he took a picture of the crap he picked off the ground, and then what it turned into it, and I'm like, What is this? Yeah, yeah. I'll tell I'll show you guys a picture, but like I was so impressed with this. Yes.

Rhys 1:11:58

And you were saying like just like it brings you peace. Yeah. And so like if our if the uh goal is world peace, although is that ever very achievable, actually, but if a goal is world peace, it would take every individual to be at peace to create collective peace. Oh, yeah, here we go.

Sam 1:12:13

Oh, we mm so who's saying too many words now?

Colette 1:12:16

Now we're getting all eschatological and shit.

Rhys 1:12:20

Whatever we're going to do.

Marla 1:12:22

Cosmic realm. It's happening.

Sam 1:12:25

We're transcending right now.

Marla 1:12:30

I love it.

Rhys 1:12:31

One day you're gonna see.

Sam 1:12:32

What do you think we did it?

Colette 1:12:34

I think we I think we did it. I think we answered everyone's question on what their small habit should be, which is do whatever helps you refine peace and brings you alive. Yeah. Um do what we did or uh do the thing that you haven't given yourself permission to do.

Sam 1:12:51

Yeah. Right. Love that. And there's clown classes, what day?

Colette 1:12:54

Yeah, there's clown classes at Big Couch with prescription joy. We'll put those in the link as well because I am avidly an evangelist of clown. You want to bring your your oil painting class and put that in as a link in the thing.

Sam 1:13:07

Yeah.

Colette 1:13:08

Let's just do it. Yeah, throw all of it.

Sam 1:13:09

Then Chalice was by Reese.

Colette 1:13:11

Chalice is by Reese.

Sam 1:13:12

Yeah.

Colette 1:13:13

We'll put the queer carter podcast back on. Put pressure on you to put more.

Rhys 1:13:17

That's the first thing you need to do. I will be up as uh releasing one soon. It's gonna have a seam of travel in it. Ooh. My experiences as a queer person traveling. Oh, I do that.

Colette 1:13:28

Well, and then you can also follow just love on all the things. Oh, yeah, all the things. That's Sam's creative little project over there. Just just love figuring out.

Sam 1:13:37

Yeah.

Marla 1:13:37

Oh, super.

Sam 1:13:38

Yeah, we'll talk. Yeah. Um, but hey, thanks uh everybody today. This was uh once again, you guys just blow me away. Blow me away. But um, and for thanks for everybody who's listening for letting your curiosity get the better of you today. We'll be back around this table again soon uh with another curious question. So until then, stay curious. Thank you for taking the time to listen to this episode of the Curious Crew Podcast. If there's something or someone in this conversation that made you curious, we want to include you in this conversation, and there's a link to that in the show notes. If you want to pull up a chair in person, we'd love to see you at our monthly gatherings. The link with dates, details, and ways for you to RSAP are in the notes as well. If you have questions or curious about starting a curious crew in your area, shoot us an email, which is found in our show notes. Thank you for letting your curiosity get the better of you today. We'll be back around the table again soon with another curious question. Until then, stay curious.